Men are like...

Laxatives
They irritate the shit out of you.
Bananas
The older they get, the less firm they are.
Weather
Nothing can be done to change them.
Blenders
You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
Chocolate Bars
Sweet, smooth, & they usually
head right for your hips.
Commercials
You can't believe a word they say.
Department Stores
Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
Government Bonds
They take soooooooo long to mature.
Mascara
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Popcorn
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Snowstorms
You never know when they're coming,
how many inches you'll get or
how long it will last.
Lava Lamps
Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Parking Spots
All the good ones are taken,
the rest are handicapped.